Thursday, February 12, 2009
I Need a Government Bailout!
Seriously, as a self-employed author with my own publishing company, I would like to apply for a government bailout. My needs are relatively small. I’m sure I will be able to squeak by on three or four million dollars – a mere pittance compared to what other companies are requesting. I will use the money to further education by visiting schools and teaching writing workshops all across the country. In addition, I will donate books to our libraries. I will work hard to create and support literacy programs right here in our country. I will create a “Books For Babies” campaign and ask for each family in America to donate just one book to help children in need.
As CEO of my own company, I will even be willing to forego the corporate jet and settle for the ability to fly on Southwest Airline whenever a school needs me. I don’t need a limousine. A new van will work just fine. And, as far as corporate retreats, I’m fine with Holiday Inns. Extravagant meals? Heck, I’m a vegetarian, so that part is easy. (My friends even joke about me being willing to stop and graze by the side of the road!)
I promise to remain transparent, or whatever the new buzzword is. I will do whatever I can to educate our youth and, in addition, I guarantee to make them smile.
If you think I deserve a bailout, please boost my ego by leaving me a comment.